Relationships Breaking Up Archives - Happy Relationship Secrets

Signs That Your Ex Is Still Interested In You

real love

Breakups are never easy! If someone has walked away from you and you’re feeling a great sense of loss, even grief, it may be a comforting thing to know that it may not necessarily be the end.

Before reading any further, you should ask yourself whether or not you genuinely would like to have your ex back, not just as “a friend” but in the same capacity and with the same dynamics that couples in intimate relationships enjoy.

You will want to honestly examine the reasons why you broke up in the first place. Was it just over a misunderstanding or a fight? Or was it due to things that were much deeper and fundamental in terms of basic compatibility and having your needs met?

Once you’ve thought it through and decided that the idea of getting your ex back would be wonderful and that you could both “make it work”, then here are some great signs that your ex is really in love with you.

1. Are They Still Interested in You as a Person?

This sign works on the assumption that you still have some casual contact with your ex, maybe through mutual friends, or a shared interest. The first great sign that your ex is still into you will be his or her attitude toward you. It’s usually very difficult to be around people who have little interest in what you’re saying. If you were with someone who says he or she doesn’t care what you think, you’d probably feel the same way.

So if your ex-partner constantly seems to be positive and upbeat in your presence, it’s a good sign. They don’t seem like they want to hurt your feelings and will usually show interest in what you’re saying. You should also start noticing whether your ex makes sure to tell you that they like you or are interested in you.

This can be quite confusing because people always seem to think that they should just let go of someone because they feel they have lost them. People often hold on to the love that they once had for someone long after they have lost them. So if your ex tells you they care for you, it could be because they miss you. But if they tell you this often, it’s also a sign that they do care. They are simply not interested in being around a person who they don’t genuinely care for.

If they aren’t telling you that, it may be a sign that they are just not interested in you as a person.

2. They Still Look at You in an Awkward Way

Sometimes, you can just feel it! You know that your ex is still looking at you the same way they did when you were together. You know their view of you hasn’t changed. Their eyes have that little twinkle in them when they see you. If you can’t hold their gaze without it feeling awkward, then it could be possible that they still have feelings for you. Another clue is if they still smile at every dorky thing you do like it’s the first time – then they are definitely not over you! If you were the one who walked away and their eyes reveal anger and hurt, it’s more than likely a sign that they’re not over you – but you’ll need to tread carefully here if you want them back.

If someone is over you, on the other hand, they will look at you in the same way that they do everyone else. You will see the indifference in their eyes.

3. Their Interest in You is Not Just Superficial

An important thing to note is that the signs that your ex does care about you are not always physical signs. Your ex is going to be concerned with everything in your life. This includes everything from how you look, what you smell like, what clothes you wear, and the way you carry yourself. They will more than likely be talking to their friends about you, or possibly posting things like philosophical quotes on social media about relationships.

If your ex suddenly wants to be friends with one or more of your friends, this is a classic sign that they’re still into you. Your friends represent the “connection” that they still feel with you. They may even ask them about you but without letting on too much.

4. They Make an Effort For Their Appearance

If your ex seems to be a bit self-conscious about his or her looks, this could be a sign that they are interested in you. If they are always trying to look better, this means they are more confident about the way they look and that they see you as an important part of their life. They will also try to make themselves look their best. So they may dress in ways that fit in with your lifestyle. This will make them more attractive to you, but it will also make them seem less needy.

5. They Left Their Things With You, Or Won’t Let You Get Your Things

Are you still holding on to that pair of jeans that your ex left at your house months ago? Abandoning insignificant items like that might point to laziness more than anything. However, it takes on a different meaning when the items have sentimental value.

If they still haven’t picked up their guitar, jewelry, or valuable electronics, that’s one of the many signs your ex is not over you. They’re waiting for you to call and ask them to come by to get those items. Then, they’re hoping that conversation will open the door to more and you can spend time together again.

The opposite situation can occur when an ex refuses to let you pick up anything you’ve left at their place. Or, they make it incredibly difficult to do so. You keep texting and you can even see a read receipt, but there’s no reply.

You need to get back that book you loaned them, or your favorite sweater, but you can’t reach them to do so. This is another sign that your ex is still holding on to any piece of your relationship they can salvage.

6. They Feel Hurt When You are Cold Toward Them

This is not something that you can observe if and when you are conversing via text messages but you may be able to sense the tone that comes through in their messages, that they are upset. After all, from all your past experiences with this person, you should be able to tell when they are feeling this way. So be on the alert for their reactions to those times when you show indifference, or don’t respond to them for some time. If you can tell that this upsets them then it should be obvious to you that it is because they still want to be a part of your life.

7. They Try to Get Touchy-Feely With You

We’re not talking here about physical contact in a sexual or uncomfortable way. Your ex may offer to hug you and hold your hand a little longer if you decide to shake hands. They might kiss you on the cheek as a greeting, or lightly place an arm around you if the ambiance of the place is right. There is some risk in them doing this, but it shows that they are still interested in you and not afraid to show it.

When They’re Not Interested Anymore

An important sign that your ex is not interested in you is if you start to notice each other less. If your ex seems to have been taking you for granted, it may be because they are taking a break from the relationship. After a while, they won’t see you as much. So if your ex suddenly starts to disappear out of sight, it could be because they are having a hard time making up their mind about you. This may mean they are ready for a change in their life.

signs your ex is still interested in you

Divorce – How to rebuild your life, your friends can help

When you are going through a divorce, you will want to start rebuilding your life. You want to make this new life of yours work as well as you can. There are no guarantees in life so you want to make sure that you are able to get the support that you want and need from those that are around you. This support will come from those of your friends and family members.

You will want to make sure that you are looking towards the friends that are always there for you. You want to make sure that you are getting the support and love that you need in order to make the most of your life and what the future will hold for you. The friends that you keep after your divorce are important. You want to make sure that you are keeping your ties open with those people that have been there with you through thick and thin.

There are going to be some of your friends that are not going to hang around. They may be closer with your spouse and keep their friendships with them. There are no simple ways to look at divorce. You want to make sure that you are keeping good contact with those that you want to and make sure that you are able to find ways to lean on the friends that you know you can trust. You have to be a little bit assertive and make sure that your friends are sincere. This is the only true way that you can be sure who you can count on and who cannot.

The main thing that you have to do when trying to keep your friends through a divorce is, to be honest. You want to make sure that you are keeping your friends close to you so that you can have a safe and secure feeling. You will want to make sure that the friends that you do keep in contact with are true and honest.

You do not want to keep friends around that are going to make life difficult for you. You do not want any friends around you that may act as spies for the opposing team. This is a hard act to follow and you may want to be upfront with them if you are suspicious in any way at all.

For some of the couples that are going through a divorce may find that they are able to keep in contact with friends that they both have had for years. This is a great situation to be in because you do not have to choose between what friends you can keep and those that you have to lose contact with. Many people have great relationships with their old friends even though they may have met them through their ex-spouse.

Sometimes people are going to want to cause trouble in your relationships and stir up some conflict. When this happens, you need to make sure that you are aware of it and take the necessary steps to make the situation better. This may mean ending ties with those that you have been close to for a long time. It may be hard but you have to do what you need to in order to keep yourself happy and healthy.

Friends can be a great support for you when you are going through a divorce. You will want to ensure that you are open with them and have someone that you can lean on as well as depend on throughout the entire situation. You will be doing something good for yourself emotionally and physically at the same time.

6 Unhealthy Reasons to Stay in a Relationship

It’s never an easy thing to end a relationship that you have invested in, emotionally and physically. However you may have felt about your relationship, the fact is, that you’ve given a big part of yourself to make it work. Most relationships are not without their ups and downs and consequently, we give ourselves all sorts of reasons to stay in one that might not be making us happy. This can cloud our judgment.

While some reasons are legitimate (such as when your present issues are circumstantial, a misunderstanding, a petty disagreement, or a phase), more often than not, we make excuses for ourselves.

So here is a checklist of things that you might like to consider, which may help you to assess whether you’re sticking around for the right reasons.

No love is worth keeping if these things are keeping you there:

1. You’re afraid of being alone.

It is better to be alone and unhappy than coupled up and unhappy. Before you say it’s a double whammy, think about this. You can’t make your partner happy if you are not happy in the relationship. And if they aren’t happy, then your unhappiness will only increase. You end up in an awful cycle of “I’m unhappy, so he’s unhappy. And he’s unhappy, so I’m more unhappy.” Get it?

Even if they are “happy” (because they’re getting what they want) and you are not (because you’re not) you need to ask yourself whether you deserve the raw end of the deal. Would you rather be alone and at peace, or with someone and feeling like a part of you is dying?

2. You are concerned about what people will think.

Other people are not in your relationship. You are. They do not go through the daily grind of being in a situation that doesn’t serve them. You do. So, other people have no right to voice their opinions or their disapproval. But, of course, when do people ever go by their rights? Yes, people might judge, and talk. So be it. You can’t please everyone.

The person who you’re currently with might even be a “really nice person” and this can add to your fear of what others may think. Just because your partner is “nice”, doesn’t mean that at “relationship level” they are willing or able to provide you with the things that are important to you – things that make it worth your while to give away your freedom and be exclusive with them. If it’s possible, you may be better of just being friends with this person.

3. You’ve been together for a long time.

Yes, the longer you spend with someone, the harder it is to leave them. You have to start over and face the unknown, and that is a difficult process (and, we are understating it). There will be an adjustment process, especially if there are some nice memories involved. But the length of time together does not define the quality of a relationship. If you’re not happy, you’re not happy.

4. You believe that all relationships are difficult.

You’re wrong about this. There are many great relationships. You might not have experienced one yet, but they’re out there and you deserve to experience it too. Yes, all relationships have bad phases. But, there is a difference between a rough patch and a toxic or incompatible, or suffocating relationship. Weigh up your pros and cons.

5. You believe that there’s nothing better out there.

There’s always something better out there. And if you are unhappy, there is definitely something better out there for you. This is a common fear that many of us have. Sure, maybe you’ll end up alone. But, remember the first thing we said? You’re better off alone and unhappy than coupled and unhappy.

6. You are not financially independent.

This can be a difficult one. I’ve heard many people say that they can’t afford to leave their partner. You may need to make some hard choices in order to become financially independent – and again, the bottom line will always be, what is most important to you? Do what you need to do. Hustle, if you have to.

Save

Relationship Breakup Advice: 8 Ways To Get It Done And Be Over It In A Healthy Way

If you’ve been thinking about ending a romantic partnership, you might be subject to all kinds of relationship breakup advice. You read about it online, see it in movies and hear an earful from people around you.

But ultimately, how you handle your own particular breakup is entirely up to you and should be based on your own situation. Every dynamic between couples has its own unique flavor, but there are some basic guidelines that everyone should follow.

Here are 8 ways to break up in a healthy, productive manner that is far less likely to leave you or your partner with long-term scars, or anger and disgust at the very thought of you.

1. Break It Off In Person

Despite the fact that no less than 24 percent of young people today believe that breaking up via text or email is acceptable, it really isn’t. Every serious relationship deserves a fitting ending, in order to make sure both parties are clear on the issues and in a better position to rebound.

2. Opt For A Public Place (So Both Of You Remain Civil)

Choosing the best place to break off a relationship is not easy, but for the sake of civility, you’re most likely both going to benefit from ending it somewhere where you’re both forced to behave. Ultimately, no matter how much you or your partner might be hurt or angry, you want to be able to discuss the matters at hand openly, honestly and without letting things get ugly.

3. Rehearse What You’re Going To Say

Rehearsing your conversation is a good way to think of what might come up and how you should respond to it. Rehearsing may also give you the boost of confidence you need to move forward with the breakup. If you have a very close friend around, use them as a sounding board and ask for their helpful feedback. You want to know how you feel for certain, and discussing it out loud will help you get there.

4. Hold A “Q And A” For Closure

When someone breaks up with someone else, their first instinct may be to run away, but abandoning the conversation will leave lingering questions and pain. Approach the situation in an open-ended manner, with the mutual goal of really feeling as if you leave the situation with no questions, doubt, or optimally, no regrets.

5. Decide Ahead Of Time If You Want To Be Friends

This is a personal decision for each of you and should only be agreed to if it’s what the both of you want. Because it will likely be brought up, it’s important that you make up your mind ahead of time if you are willing to remain friends. Most often, it’s better to give each other time to get over the breakup and to digest everything that’s happened, but you should have a general idea of whether or not you’d like to continue seeing this person casually in your life after it’s over.

6. Give Your (Soon To Be) Ex Time To Talk

It’s tempting to blurt out “I’m breaking up with you!” and want no further interaction, due to the heavy emotions that may ensue; however, given that the relationship involves two people, each with their own set of complicated emotions, both of you should have plenty of time to talk. Have a compassionate ear, so long as it’s deserved, and be as kind to them as you’d want to be treated.

7. If It’s Really Over, Be Very Clear About It

Some couples break up on a regular basis, getting back together when the mood suits them. If this is not your intention, be explicitly clear that you want it to be over. Even leaving the door open a little bit can keep hope alive for a long time and that’s just unnecessarily hurting the other person.

8. Give Yourself Time To Heal

Even if you think it’s a good thing that you’ve broken off the relationship, it’s always wise to take healing time. Don’t let yourself pretend like everything is normal when it’s not. Talk to trusted friends and family about how you feel, what your hopes for the future are and any other residual emotional effect the relationship has on you.

The relationship breakup advice you follow should be based on how you feel in your heart, and guided by the logic in your head. Of course, you can’t totally script how it will play out, but if you have a thoughtful plan in place first, you should both find a happy ending to the parting of ways.